Does this seem over the top to you?

Over at Faith and Family Live there was a discussion recently about finding out the gender of a baby before it's birth. Among all of the judgment free, this is what we do and why (the numbers were fairly mixed) was this response:

I am a firm believer in waiting to find out. That’s how God intended it. The joy of the reward is intended to be at the end. I actually don’t even think women should be allowed to find out the gender of their babies ahead of time. Finding out beforehand puts too much emphasis on gender, and will eventually lead to gender selected abortions since people feel entitled to mothering a child of each gender since so many people are now only having 2 children. Even if we have a preference one way or another, as Catholics we must trust that God sends us the baby we need. As Catholics, it’s imperative that we understand and accept this if we hope to foster a culture of life and a culture of Trust in God and His blessings. In a culture where the “ideal family” is so often viewed as 1 boy and 1 girl, women now feel entitled to one of each and go to crazy and even take immoral measures to make sure they’re able to have one of each…because they feel it’s their right. I am also the mom of all boys. Don’t spoil the surprise. Open your present at Christmas, which is the way God intended it when He created the mystery of childbearing and childbirth. Plus, it will be more exciting for all of us on the sidelines. ~R. (Childbirth Instructor and Mother)

I'm sorry but I am offended. Not because I am a person who has waited and also found out, but because I am a Catholic. I think it is hardly the place of one of us to tell the others that finding out is anti-Catholic. After all, I don't recall the Holy See sending out any directives instructing women not to find out the sex of their babies before birth. And in India, a country with one of the highest rates of abortion due to the sex of the baby, it has been outlawed for women to find out the sex. Although the author claims it is the way of God not to know, what do we make then of Sarah who was told by an angel, or Elizabeth, or Mary? It is quite a leap to assume that knowledge of the sex of a child in a culture that does not value one sex over another the way many in Asia or Africa do will automatically lead to abortions. Moreover, I have heard many in the pro-life movement state that not finding out the sex of the baby was contradictory to the message of the movement as it gave the baby a value in the eyes of those who are anti-life. Perhaps the author is unknowledgable to the fact that many of us trust in God while knowing the sex of our children. For example, I found out my son was a boy (I was the one who saw it first) at the same visit I was informed he had a possible congenital heart defect and knowing there was nothing I could do but have faith in God brought me great comfort. And my husband and I have always prayed for the child we were meant to have not a boy or girl. Knowing these things does not stop those prayers. In fact, I am unclear as to why this author does not come right out and advocate for no ultrasounds to be offered at all. People who do not find out the sex of their child have aborted for supposed birth defects after all.

I also find it offensive that the author felt the need to list "mother" as one of her credentials as if all the others who posted were not mothers. It was totally unnecessary and seemed to be the mark of a highly insecure person. If I am speaking of my children, and finding out their sexes, is it not implied I am a mother? Why would I need to put that in other people's faces as a reason why my opinion should matter? I am also not sure about including her occupation as a childbirth instructor. Does that mean she is better qualified than other mothers to make this determination about finding out the sex of the baby? She wants to be surprised only at the birth, so does she turn couples out of class who found out the sex of their baby at a 20 week ultrasound or by amniocentesis a bit earlier?

It's a personal decision. The Church has not directed any teachings on it. To tell other's that they are not pro-life because they do or do not know the sex of an unborn child is ludicrous. To flout one's personal and business credentials as proof of her authority on a matter such as this is outrageous. I pray for her that her heart may be lifted of her judgment of others.

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Happy Birthday!

to me!

I have entered a new decade and couldn't have spent it with better people!

Tiny Treasures

William--every day is a new adventure in Will-world. He is superman of the exersaucer and is doing better in his crib although he rolls over in his sleep and HATES that.

Joseph-- This past week has been temper-tantrum city! I hope he grows out of this phase soon. The only solution, unfortunately, is isolation.

Shelby--Shelby still loves school. She is excited to go every morning now.

Sorry this is short and sweet...very busy week!

The Photo Album Alternative

Last year I went on a "playdate" on the way to my parents at a friend's house who has two boys, one six months older than Shelby the other 3 months younger than Joey. I was newly pregnant with Will at the time. I was in envy of how "picked up" her house seemed but mostly with a small project she had completed.

On the wall of her playroom was a family picture poster where she had pictures of family members' faces so that her boys would learn the names.

A year later I am doing the same. We have pictures in frames in the hallway. For the reason that there is glass associated, they are not kid friendly. Shelby's shredding has made photo albums impossible. So I am getting around to doing this. With a twist.

Several of our friends live across the country and we rarely get to see them. So a chunk of our posters (yes there is more than one, I have a large family, remember) will be friends who we consider to be family especially to Jeff. I have printed off pictures mainly from facebook with the owners' permission. I'm nowhere near done and already Joey is learning names. I don't want the few occasions we meet with these people to be full of Joey figuring out who they are. So, in the boys' bedroom we are posting these so Joey will know this is "Aunt Sherri" or "Uncle Daryl" when he sees them and just go about the business of visiting.

Quick Takes---I'm caving to the Pressure lol

1) Whose Kids Are These Anyway?

It's a question I am asking myself more and more these days. I have always wondered why my kids won't eat the "kid staples." They dislike tater tots and macaroni and cheese to name a couple. But sometimes my kids surprise me. Like Joseph with his compassion toward his sister during a thermal-nuclear meltdown. Or Shelby during her playdate yesterday showing steps toward interacting with the other autistic child we had here. Always something new to learn in the Mommy-game!

2) Friends are Friends forever, a lifetime's not too long to live as friends

Recently some of my husband's high school classmates became friends with me. We became fast friends and for many of us very close very quickly. I often wonder if I was born in the wrong time and being around them rouses that suspicion even more. But as one pointed out, I was born in God's time, and although I am "late to the party" so to speak, I have caught up to speed and hit the ground running. Talking to some of these people it's as if I had been around all along and some even forget I wasn't. I am so thankful to God for putting them into our lives.

3) Variety is the spice of life

Joseph has always loved the movie Cars, but I could tell it was starting to wear just a bit so I had introduced 101 Dalmatians (the 1961 animated version) as well as Ratatouille and Finding Nemo. He is now enjoying a good rotation.

4) Oldies but Goodies

After years of searching, Jeff found Snoopy's Reunion on DVD at Wal-Mart. For those unfamiliar with this Charles Schulz animated mini-feature it tells the story of the litter of beagle puppies born at the Daisy Hill Puppy Farm and how one, after being returned by a rich little girl who was no longer allowed to keep him, became the pet of Charlie Brown and named Snoopy. After returning to Daisy Hill to find it is no more, Snoopy invites his brothers and sisters from all over the country for a reunion. It's a warm and fuzzy movie that makes no apologies for being that way!

5) Farmville

I'd like to know who suggested to me to get this application on facebook. It is addicting, but very fun. You grow and harvest your crops, tend to your animals and build your farm. Very inspiring for those out there with brown thumbs, no land and little animal sense!

6) Work

Just a quick update. Still going well. 60 days down, 30 to go!

7) Recognition

This week I chose to recognize to management some of my co-workers who I feel do their job with pride and show exceptional teamwork. It brought a smile to my manager's face to hear about things that happen when she's not around and it won a small reward for those I mentioned! A little recognition in our world goes a long way still!

Check out Conversion Diary for more Quick Takes!

Do I Remember The Gift My Faith Is?

It's a question that I realized this week we sometimes dont' think about, but should.

Lerin, as a convert, has been telling her conversion story. It is deeply personal and extremely moving. Her story reminds me of Paul's and although she avoided being knocked off a horse literally, her revelation is no less dramatic. This week, as I read the third installment, (read the first here and the second here) it occurred to me how as a cradle Catholic, I have had the luxury of always accepting what the Church taught as truth (I realize not all cradle Catholics are in this situation of faith and belief, but many, many are) and not having to reconcile the Church's teachings with ones from another faith background. It also occurred to me that cradle Catholics have their own conversion stories as well.

While I don't know that I have a specific conversion story as I feel mine is still going on each and every day of my life that I believe, I do remember stories of friends who felt like they had a solid faith life and believed until suddenly, life showed them just how much they would need that faith by testing it. I am reminded of 1 Corinthians 13:11: When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

It is in this idea of personal growth and change that we begin to see conversion stories take place. It is in recognizing the gift of our faith that we begin to put childish ways behind us and walk as women and men of God.